Sometimes you have to say "no" to redirect yourself downstream

Saying "no" can be hard for me. I have always been the type of person to have many different commitments, most of which have been related to working harder to make more money. For example, when I was a full-time Spanish professor at the community college, I also taught a Monday evening class at another community college and worked part time at Banana Republic. Though I was working a lot, I didn't feel like I had any more money. In the last couple of days I was faced with a scenario that forced me to re-evaluate my commitments and my ability to say "no!"

Though I am now a life coach and motivational speaker, I have still been doing my other side jobs , teaching one evening class at the community college and working a few hours here and there at Banana Republic. This fall, I had the opportunity to take on two classes at the community college instead of one. Initially, this sounded like a good idea since I felt that I needed to extra money.

As I accepted the idea of teaching two classes instead of one, I found out that I would have to teach on Wednesday evenings instead of Monday evenings because of a scheduling conflict. I had already committed to two life coaching clients on Wednesday evenings, so I would have to rearrange my schedule to accommodate them on another night in order to teach at the college on Wednesdays.

Then it hit me. I am the one who caused the scheduling conflict in the first place! I remembered that I told my director in the spring that I would not be teaching in the fall because I was starting a new career and needed to let go of some commitments.

How had I forgotten that? Well, my highest self obviously had not forgotten and arranged for this conflict to arise as a sign for me to let it go! Though I didn't initially see this situation in this light, when I considered how I truly felt about teaching the Wednesday class I realized that I didn't feel in sync with the downstream direction of my life and my new career. I emailed my director and let her know that I would not be able to do the Wednesday class and instantly felt a little freer.

I probably wouldn't have been as willing to let go of the class if I hadn't just read the new Esther and Jerry Hicks book The Astonishing Power of Emotions. Last night, as I was reading a couple of sections (for the second time) aloud to my husband it struck me that I was not following my "downstream" emotions on the issue of the class. The book suggests usingyour emotions as your guide. When you are feeling bad about something, you are paddling upstream and against the current. When you are feeling good about something, you are flowing downstream and with the current.

The key is this: EVERYTHING you want in your life is downstream. Though this is hard for us to embrace in American society as we constantly force situations and make them work, this powerful book emphasizes the importance of allowing the current to turn you downstream when you are having upstream thoughts and feelings.

The next time you are questioning whether or not something is in alignment with your highest self, ask if the decision makes you feel as though your paddling upstream and against the current or downstream and with the current. When you're feeling good, you're in the flow and are moving in the direction of the fulfillment of your desires. When you are feeling bad about something, do what you can to feel better and let go of the oars of forced effort and allow the current to take you downstream.